top of page

No Conflict, They SAid

In Australia and around the world, legislation is being introduced that replaces sex with gender identity. Advocates insist that there is no conflict of interest. But governments are not collecting data on the impacts of this legislative change. We're worried about the impacts on women of men using women-only spaces, including but not limited to: changing rooms, fitting rooms, bathrooms, shelters, rape and domestic violence refuges, gyms, spas, sports, schools, accommodations, hospital wards, shortlists, prizes, quotas, political groups, prisons, clubs, events, festivals, dating apps, and language. If we can't collect data, we can at least collect stories. Please tell us how your use of women-only spaces has been impacted. All stories will be published anonymously. If you know of other women who have been impacted, please encourage them to tell their stories too.

This site is run from Australia, New Zealand members of the LGB Defence, AWW Inc. and supported by LGB Alliance.

AWW logo.png
LGB_LOGO_WHITE.png
  • @ConflictSaid

I have a close friend named S, who is on the autism spectrum. One of the ways it affects her life is through touch. She cannot tolerate people touching her in any way. I have known S for 16 years and in that time, we have developed a strong and close friendship and even I still cannot bump her hand without freaking her out.


At the time of the story, we were both members of a community-based recreation club. A new member joined the club, an M2F transgender person, who had a habit of hugging people as a greeting. S asked them, several times not to hug her, but being a big, burly, overbearing person, they would ignore S and force themselves onto her. “Don’t be stupid” they’d say “Everyone loves a hug.”


S became more and more withdrawn. She was terrified of being alone with this person. The club she loved so much was no longer a haven for her. It wasn’t a single sex club, that would have been against the law in Australia, but it was a place where she was comfortable and felt accepted. This person took that right from her.


Other women in the group began also to express discomfort when around this person. They’d beg us not to let them be alone when this person was around. They were fearful. And so, my girlfriend and I tried to talk to this person reasonably about their behaviors thinking that as lesbians ourselves and members of the ‘rainbow’ community, we may have a common ground to help us project the message. They tried turning the accusations back on us complaining we were victimizing them for being a trans. What absolute self-absorbed idiocy! They were a self-entitled bully who preyed on women.


A fully transitioned individual, having completed top, bottom, and trachea surgery, and yet they still maintained that masculine, dominating attitude that allowed them to think it was ok to force themselves on a woman. They could not be convinced to see it other than harmless play. Anyway, it got to the stage that, with our encouragement and support, S had to make a formal complaint to the Committee that resulted in our ‘friend’ leaving the club with a grudge and mutterings of transphobia.


No amount of surgery, medication, or reassignment could’ transition’ their sense of ingrained male superiority. They are still very much a ‘he’ and a threat to all women. How dare he violate my vulnerable friend in such a way.

Just thought I would share a recent experience at my workplace. I am a 53 year old high school teacher in Brisbane. Since all teacher laptops look the same, we often add stickers to differentiate our laptop from the next, and these stickers are usually causes close to our hearts. For three years I have had an I ♥️ JK Rowling sticker on mine, and a ‘Female, nothing more, never less’. These accompany some Alaskan bear stickers and an indigenous Australian sticker plus a save the reef sticker. 

Two days ago I was called into the head of science’s office and asked to take my laptop out. He pointed out my two feminist stickers and told me I had to remove them as they breached the code of conduct. I asked him how and he didn’t say. He said there had been a complaint (he couldn’t say how many, or who or why). He said if I didn’t remove the stickers by 9pm I would be in breach of the code of conduct and so would he.


This directive was sent from admin at the school. I told him I would comply but that I didn’t agree with it and I thought it was BS. I replaced those stickers with a more subtle ‘This witch doesn’t burn’ the next day. Still mad at being censored. I think I know who complained - a ‘non-binary‘ pronouns in bio lesbian teacher who I interacted with recently and who took an unusual amount of time looking at my laptop lid during the interaction. Here are the offending stickers.



Writer's picture: anonymous womananonymous woman

I am so bloody sick of being obedient to men. At my University in Sydney, there are stickers prominently displayed in many of the ladies’ bathrooms (not the men’s, I’ve been able to confirm, only the ladies') saying This is an inclusive safe space for all female and non-binary identifying humans; abuse or transphobia of any kind will not be tolerated”. I do not think stating my boundaries as a woman should be construed as “abuse”.

As a survivor of SA and male violence - and more broadly, as a woman who has had to interact with men every day of my life (if you get it, you get it) - I now feel that the one space where I could escape men for 5 minutes a few times a day has been stripped away from me.


There is now literally no way to get away from them, to take the mask off, to stop protecting myself and just breathe out. A bit of dignity, a break from performing for them and feeling their eyes on me. It’s not just students either - the gender identity language has started to creep into everyday usage in lectures.

The clear message is that women’s voices are unwelcome. Why does it feel like I’m the only one who’s angry about this? Why is there this cone of silence among women, where I can tell we’re thinking the same things but nobody dares to say it out loud? If more people stood up and said enough is enough, we’d be able to put an end to this ridiculousness.


bottom of page