group therapy for women who have experienced male violence

I run group therapy for women who have experienced gendered violence such as domestic violence, rape and sexual abuse, where the perpetrators are more often than not male (and 100% male in the clients I have worked with).

I am very concerned about the mental health and triggering of PTSD symptoms in these women by allowing trans women who have not fully transitioned or are evidently not female in appearance into the group, because of the triggering effect this may have on the mental health of the women in the group when it is supposed to be a safe space for women, free from triggers which in large part include men due to the abuse suffered.

I can’t advertise that this group is for cis-women only, because of the possibility of losing my registration to practice as a psychologist due to gender identity discrimination, however, I am also ethically obligated to “do no harm” to my clients, and my experiences are that this would be harmful to some of my clients and would result in an environment of silence, hyper vigilance and anxiety, rather than a place of growth, sharing and healing.

While I recognise that trans women are also at very high risk of abuse by men, and need spaces to heal also, they don’t seem to have empathy for cis-women in understanding that being a man, whether or not you identify as one, is one of the biggest PTSD triggers for women who have experienced gendered violence and many women who have been through gendered trauma, need a space that is free from men and people who have at any point identified as men, to be able to share their experiences without fear and feel safe to do so.

I feel an ethical responsibility to these women to protect their safe space for trauma treatment, but am conflicted about how to hold a safe space for these women and still have safe spaces for trans and gender non-conforming individuals as a seperate trauma workshop, without being accused of transphobia or being a TERF.

The fact is, both cis-women and trans women have different needs when it comes to safe group therapy spaces for trauma treatment, but how do we achieve this when we aren’t even allowed to discuss it?

#australia #grouptherapy #trauma #PTSD #recovery #supportgroups

pronouns in the email signature

I have been seeing a somatic therapist regularly for about 5 years and noticed that she has recently included the "she/her" pronouns in her email signature. I have been seeing this therapist for reasons that involve my biology as a female and my lived experience of this, and now feel uncomfortable to speak with her about my experiences as a woman.

#australia #counselling #somatictherapy #pronouns #signalling #trust #body

science centre bathrooms

Five years ago, I was taking my four-year old to the women’s bathroom at the children’s science centre. When I arrived, an older man was in the bathroom washing his hands and talking to two unaccompanied girls (it is a kids’ science museum after all). When I entered, he said “Oh, is this the women’s restroom? I must be confused” and left. I watched him recording children playing in the museum on his phone afterwards and notified the staff.

I question myself about what I would or could do if this man was wearing a wig and presenting as a woman? I would want to protect those unaccompanied girls. But would that make me a target of violence? Would the science centre staff listened to my concerns? Should I tell my teen daughter that she might see someone with a penis openly changing when she goes swimming; how should I even prepare her for this?

Women need single-sex spaces. There are predators that want to access the women and children that use them. It’s impossible for us to know if someone is there for genuine or sinister reasons. As long as people with penises tend to be the overwhelming number of rapists in the world, they shouldn’t have access to the rooms where the vast majority of rape victims go for safety and privacy.

It should be obvious how problematic this is, but somehow these concerns are dismissed and ignored. Women and girls matter.

#canada #bathrooms #toilets #sciencecentre #malepredators #children #safety #singlesexspaces #safeguarding